A special day.

When I think about the Year End Exam, it's making me stress. Yet I'm still not in a mood to study. I slept at eleven last night, and I only managed to wake up at three just now. Three more weeks to exams, one more month to training. Oh yea, two more weeks to get my P license. Ha ha. Ya lah. I know I'm twenty this year and I haven't get my license yet. But it doesn't make me feel bad about it. Bell just got her CDL license last week and she doesn't want to take off the P from her car. She is seriously weird, lol.

Anyway, today is a special day. A very special day.
Wanna know what happened?
I got myself a new boyfriend :)



No lah. It's special cos the number 29 on Februarys only appear on calendars once in four years. I'm not that desperate like some people out there. But honestly, sometimes it feels good to have that someone :(

P/S: I'm back to my blogging mood :D

Fuck you, lecturer.

Camwhoring in my college's main office.

So, today woke up at six to get myself prepared for college. When I reached KL Sentral, I received a sms from my class rep telling me that the class was delayed to nine. Ya lah. It's somehow like a normal thing for her class already. She's always late. From the first class until now, she never ever be punctual even for a day. The earliest she ever arrived is fifteen minutes after the exact time she should've. The pissed off part was when my class rep smsed me again informing me that the class was cancelled just before nine. If you're not planning to come in the first place, please lah tell us earlier. Fuck you. Wasted my whole morning in college for shit. This is not the first time you cancelled the class okay helllooo... >:!

Spent my whole morning in the student lounge, chit-chatting and searching information for my English essay assignment which the due date is on 4th March 2008. Then around noon, went out with Kelly and Bell to Kenny Roger's in Sunway Pyramid to have our lunch. Came back to college at one to attend Statistic class. Reached home before six. It was raining heavily in the evening, I was all wet ):

Snapped by Bell while waiting for the lift in Sunway Pyramid.

If you're not feeling so happy about me, then come and confront me. It's better than you start backstabbing me behind. True friends don't do that. I hope you're not, or else I'm really very disappointed in you. To gain a friendship trust you need a lifetime, but to destroy a friendship you just need one second. You always thought you knew everything but the fact is you're not, you don't even know what friends actually mean. You just know how to think at one side, not both side.

A birthday celebration.

HAPPY 19th BIRTHDAY TO ESTHER CHUNG YI HUA :)

Today I skipped the eight o'clock class since I couldn't wake up at six. So I only attended one class today from ten to twelve. The afternoon class was cancelled. Wow, during the Plant&Premises class, I was paying attention in class. Like oh my fuck god. I didn't even bother to reply Jensen's sms. Ha ha. That is like so not me, really. Maybe cos I was over-tired, and I can hardly keep my eyes open, so I rather choose to keep my mouth closed and listen to Miss Hema's lecture. In conclusion, I learnt the whole chapter 3! A good start.. :)

After class, we went to Sunway Pyramid's Esquire Kitchen Restaurant to celebrate our friend's birthday. They bought a Chocolate Banana cake from Secret Recipe. I didn't know that until they asked me to pay my part for it. We all went our separate way at around three. Bell sent me to Bdr Tasik Selatan and that time, I was feeling abit dizzy already. I called my eldest brother to pick me up at Putrajaya Sentral and he said he is not at home. So, I took a bus ride home instead of taking cab cos I don't think it's worth paying eight bucks when my house is only 3-4km away from there. Reached home at four something and took a long nap. Woke up and had my dinner cum supper at eleven.




I am not feeling happy about a few person today and specifically a her . Maybe bcos I was too tired, so I get pissed off very easily. I'm not going to mention names over here although it's my blog, I can say whatever I want. If you knew I'm talking about you, I hope you don't talk to me in such way anymore or maybe I should say don't talk to others like that cos you sounds like an immature kid. And one advice for you; appreciate your friends while they are still there for you. Don't take it for granted. I'm not trying to say that I'm mature but at least I'm better. I don't fucking care if it's making you or anyone else pissed off with the way I acted today. I don't like keeping stuffs in my heart. If I'm an sensitive ass fuck for you, then I am lah :)

Go on girl.

I so wanna get myself another layout instead of using the original template but I just couldn't get any ideas even I've visited blogskins.com. I'm so not gonna use my old layouts cos I'm sick of them. Erm, actually using this also not bad right. Simple, clean, neat and nice, lol. In conclusion, I'm gonna stick with this for a period of time :D

Oh well, Year End Exam is just around the corner. It's not even a month counting from today. So many subjects, so much of the chapters. I seriously should start doing my revision now. I don't want to screw up my first year leh. Argh! What did I learn in term 1? in term 2? I even misplaced my notes. This is so not good ):

(1) Oenology
(2) Food Science and Sanitation
(3) Accounting
(4) Business of Hospitality and Tourism
(5) Purchasing and Cost Control
(6) Plant and Premises

The six subjects I fear the most. The subjects that I never pay attention in class before. How I wish I could turn back the time.. and then if I could, I will change myself to at least pay a little bit attention in class and shut my mouth a little bit. Wow, that is so not me huh. Ha ha Ü

I can't help.

Just because you're crazy about him and you'll never love quite the same again, doesn't mean he's the best for you. Yeah, you got it right. But there is just something about him that keeps holding me back whenever I want to let it go. If only life hadn't been so harsh and made things end the way they did, things might be better, a lot better I shall say. Remember when you were smaller, and you just seem to love everybody, I mean every cute guys you met. It's not really like that once you get older. I love him not because he's one of the kind of boy that every girls want. I admit I fell for him at the first sight I met him at the stairs. But I wouldn't fell so much deeper if we didn't share any moments together. I really miss all those times that we will sms throughout the day, the times we would talk on the phone for hours, the times when he looked at me and that's when I know at that moment I crossed his mind, the times when he held me tightly in his arms, the times when we kissed, the times when we shared our problems, the times when he purposely wake up early to give me a wake up call, the times he would come early to college just to meet me, the times when we laughed at each other, the times we had bed fighting, all the beautiful memories we once had together and the memories that he will never remember. I will always remember the first and the last movie we caught together, The Golden Compass. And I will definitely remember all those times he hurt me badly. The day when he can let go of everything. The day when he can just break my heart, leaving me alone. There are times when I think I just hate him to the core, or how he always want to win those stupid fights, no matter how rude he was, I can't help but think about him. There is just no control over that feeling you get when he looks at you in that certain way, just something about him that drives you crazy, and even over his stupidest laugh, you will still say that you're madly in love with him. I want him back, but in the same time, I would rather let things fade day by day cos I knew he will hurt me over and over again.

Please don't be worry about me, I'm fine, just a feel of sudden to rant all those shits about him. Trust me when I say I'm okay.

I guess I won't love you forever.

My friend asked me, "I thought you love him?" I rolled my eyes and answered, "But that doesn't mean I will take his shits, right?"


&& when everything starts to fade away does that mean that the pain will go with it to?

If things were different.

Now Playing > > > Natalie - Going Crazy
You know you really miss him when tears roll down your cheek for no reason at all. I'm sick of pretending every thing's okay when every thing's really not going fine with me. Why do I fell in love with a player in the first place? There is no past tense in loving someone, it's either you did or you never.

Do you still remember how you said you love hugging me from the back? I smile every time I think about every little thing you said even if it was stupid because that's just what I love about you. I miss bed fighting with you because that's when the world belongs to us. I hate every girls that flirt with you because that's when they held my entire world.

&& I can never change the fact that you will never care a single shit about me. Do I even matter to you all this time? No, I don't.

Valentine's Day.

Now Playing > > > Tonight I Wanna Cry - Keith Urban

I thought it would be another boring day. But I was wrong! I knew he was holding something, I assume it was flowers. But when he showed it, I was like ohmygod, barney! Every girls got a bouquet of pink/red flowers on their arms while I was carrying the big size barney. Haha. I think the girls were jealous when they just like keep looking at me. Ok, whatever la. Wanted to catch a movie but it's effing pack with couples. So ended up in Esquire Kitchen Restaurant. I'm so addicted with the soup. Delicious! Reached home at nine. Thankyou for making my day, boy :)



Oh by the way, the boy I went out with today ain't my boyfriend. He's my ex-boyfriend, Bernard. We lasted for two years. He wanted a patch back, but I don't think I want it. I realized after all these shit, I still love Wayne Soo. I hate that I love you so. You will just give me butterflies and at the same time, causing me pain. I fell too hard in the first place. I hope you had a great day with someone today. You didn't even bother to message me anymore. Oh well, I'm just another girl in your life right? I just want to thank you, thank you from the bottom of my heart for all those sleepless nights and for tearing me apart.

I should be happy that I'm single and mingle now huh?


edited


From Issac :)

It left the bottom line cos both brothers and mom ate most of it. I only ate one.

You break my heart.

Now Playing > > > Jojo - Leave (Get Out)

I thought we can put up everything and celebrate Valentine's Day tomorrow but I guess I put too much hope in it. I knew I was at fault for shouting at you last night. You said; once a player, not always a player. Yea, I agreed with you. So once a flirt, always a flirt huh? I just somehow don't trust you like how I do in the past anymore. I feel those insecurities when I'm with you. You need space. And I give you hell lots of freedom, remember that! I don't stick with you in college. I let you have your own space with friends, and I'm still not good enough for that? I'm such a loser to have just bear with you all these times. Because of you, I lost my pride. And it's enough. Hey, let me tell you. I need a man who loves me more than you do. Or maybe whatever you said about your feels for me are all lies. I gave you a lot of chances, but you take it all for granted. So don't blame everything on me. You'd never changed.

I tolerated with you, called you and you started the fight. But I just can't stand when you said this; if you want to leave then leave, but don't ever come back to tell me you love me. All along, is it I'm the one who tried so hard for this? You're the one who wanted to start this relationship all over again, but ended up you're the one who asked me to leave. Wow, you're sorry now. That solves absolutely nothing. Every insults you said half an hour ago makes me realized that you're not worth to get the best of me. All the good times we had might have just been a game you played in my head. I won't be replying every single messages you send to me today, so stop wasting your time and credit. I had had enough of all the shits you put on me. We're over and I'm finally moving on. Thankyou for all those insults. I don't give a damn shit to this relationship anymore.

I know you will be reading this, just let it be a nice ending. All these times, I wish you would just put in more effort, called me more often, met me more often, told me you love me more often but more important than anything, showed me you love me more often. But it's too late. I want a breakup, really. That's all. Leave me alone.

And I'm now hating this url as much as every single memory in it. I'm leaving. I don't know when I will be back. Maybe tomorrow, maybe not.

I think we need a break up, seriously.
No one said life was gonna be easy.
But I'm gonna make it all worthwhile.
Love me or leave me. I don't mind anymore.
I am still determined to be cheerful and happy, in whatever situation I maybe.
For I have also learned from experience that you'd never changed.

I don't feel like blogging anymore.
I'm starting to hate this url as much as every single memory in it.

Finally I'm home!

Today had restaurant practical. Abit more to failure I should say. And the VIPs sucks to the hell. Don't want to talk more about it. So yesterday, I was at the airport the whole day. I couldn't get a flight from Sibu to Kuching as my parents bought the ticket late. So our tickets were wait listed only. Wow, was in the Sibu Airport for five hours! Reached Kuching International Airport, have to wait for the flight to KL again. The direct flight from Sibu to KL is fucking full. What a shit day I had. MAS should have more flight for it. Now, I think AirAsia got better service than MAS, lol.

So, three more days to Valentine's. I don't think I'm celebrating it with that jackass. It would just be another Thursday for me. Don't ask me why. You won't understand even if I explained it to you cos you would just say that couple should celebrate it together. It's my fucking love life, so shut your penis up. I will be more than grateful :)

Didn't take much photos on my trip. I took a few photos with my baby cousin, Yew Hong. Check it out in my friendster, or just be patient.. I will upload it soon here. I just need a sleep now. Night world.

Slacked at home the whole day. & I'm so fucked up with baby. Yeah, I know we always quarrel. I will never be his priority. Even iloveyous are so hard to come out from his mouth. So far he only said it to me less than ten times? He always say as long as you feel it, it's enough, don't have to say it out. Ok, fine! Hey, I don't quarrel with him because of this okay? It's another thing.

My flight is on Wednesday and I haven't pack anything so far. Where's my luggage?


Current mood:

On my way back home from The Mines.

Today, went to the Driving Academy early in the morning. I was sleepy and I kept yawning when the instructor bring me for the Bangi "tour". Reached home at one and I took a nap until three. Accompanied my parents to The Mines. I bought a new dress from SML. From the photo, you can't really see the design. I like the design la cos it's simple yet nice. The shoes I'm wearing is the one I bought yesterday.



Didn't get myself any new clothes for Chinese New Year yet as none caught my eyes. Omg. Anyway, nothing to be worried about, too as I don't think this year I'm going anywhere to get angpao(red packet). Feeling weird? Cos most of my relatives aren't living in Sarawak anymore (in Canada, Taiwan, Sabah, Ipoh, etc). I'm just going back to visit my mum's elder and younger sister, that's all. My childhood friends are all in Miri, Sarawak but I'm going to Sibu, Sarawak. So that's the reason.

I also bought a new glasses from


The side(milky orange) is made of rubber.

I was wearing contact lens, so I had to take it off and wait for half an hour before they can check on my eyes. Glad that my power is still the same, so scare that it increased. Before heading home, we had our dinner at Enquire Kitchen Restaurant.

Baby is sick. Too bad I can't drive a car around yet. If not, I wanna go take care of him ):


Current mood:

Taken few days ago while waiting for ERL in Bdr Tasik Selatan. Can't remember when.

Today was a great day!

Woke up at seven. Got ready for the 10am's interview at Putrajaya Mariott Hotel with Bell, Miki, Bebe, Esther, Jeff and the other two girls(I'm not sure about their name, should be Eva and Claire?). The HR assistant manager, Mr Adrian Pinto is fucking friendly. I like him. Ha ha. We all passed the interview!

Met up baby after that. He picked me up and we went to his house cos we had no idea where to go. No new movies for us to watch. And that fucking baby is lazy to go shopping. Then around evening, he went to meet his friends. I rather not tagging along as he will surely ignored me when he started his fucking idiot ball game. See, I can tolerate now by not sticking with him all the time. Proud eh?

So reached home, followed my parents down to the center of KL. They went to Petaling Street just to get the Wo Lai Ye(selling those dried meats). Don't ask me why they purposely went there. I've no idea why, too. The queue there is sooooo fucking long lo. Luckily my mum bought those vacum ones, if not sure wait hell long for our turn to buy normal ones.

After that, went Low Yat to have a look at the laptops. I'm gonna get a new one soon, most probably by next month if I keep mentioning it in front of them. Ha ha. Well, I get myself a new shoes from



for housekeeping practical class. I bumped into Marvin and Sio Sen on my way out from Sg.Wang. I saw Rebekah and her boyfriend, too.

Didn't get myself any new clothes as none of them caught my eye this time. Before heading home, we had our dinner at a restaurant in Low Yat(I don't remember the name). My mum is having a sore throat, so dad brought her to



Wow! We sat there for nearly half an hour. So fucking boring, dad and mum busy talking to the so-called-doctor then I took out my phone to snap photos :p



Parents spent nearly 400bucks just for that small bottle of honey and metropolis? Argh. Don't know what is it called. I needa wake up before seven tomorrow to go to the Driving Academy. Ishh!

Baby is still wondering outside with the losers who he called as brothers. I miss you =)


Current mood:

I'm not perfect. I'll annoy you. I'll piss you off. I'll say stupid things, then take them back. But you put all that aside. && realize that you'll never find a girl that cares more about you than me.

You make me feel like the greatest person in the entire world today.


Current mood: